Sophie Reade – waiting for a bus
For those worried that Mario Balotelli might be having trouble settling in to life as a Premier League footballer, grab a tissue and get ready to wipe away proud, emotional tears, with some moving relationship news from today’s Sun.
Word has it that having stolen Big Brother winner Sophie Reade’s heart – presumably thanks to ream-upon-ream of erotic Italian poetry and a romantic Christmas steamrollering – Balotelli then immediately broke it by proceeding to smear himself all over Ms Reade’s best buddy, another breasty thing called Faye-Evette Betts.
Like so many hot glamour models these days, Reade decided to vent her fury online with a series of infuriated Twitter twats, such as:
“Would like to let everyone know @FayeEvette is a s*** and slept with the guy I was seeing! What a friend and welcome 2011.”
“Mario Balotelli is a ****er!!”
Welcome to English football, Mario. You’ve arrived.